This past weekend a group of high school students and leaders traveled to Timber Bay Camp near Lake Mille Lacs for our first-ever youth mentoring fall retreat. It was a weekend of campfires, card games, natural beauty, and time for reflection. It also held a surprise none of the students saw coming.
Much of the reflection focused on identity. Students were invited to consider where their identity comes from, and some of the common misconceptions about what matters in who we are. “You are not your mistakes and you are not what you’ve accomplished. You are not what you own, or how you do in sports, or what grades you get, “said one of the leaders, “You are so much more than that. And you deserve to know the complete ‘you’ because that’s the ‘you’ the world needs the most.”
Students had time to reflect on their own anywhere on the camp’s hundred-plus acres of forested trails, and to talk in small groups and one-on-one with mentors throughout the weekend. Chances to slow down and process like this are rare, and the students took full advantage. One student said they were surprised by the depth of it, and how it uncovered some things they didn’t realize they were carrying.
But it was also a time to relax and have fun. Between sessions, students played basketball and ping pong, rode mountain bikes around camp, and stopped by the barn to pet the horses and ponies. One high school senior noticed the balance: “It would be easy to spend too much time on teaching or try too hard to just make everything fun. The mix here is just right.”
The most meaningful moment of the weekend came when Israel, the program director, shared a secret project he’d been working on. In the weeks before the retreat, he had asked parents, coaches, and mentors from each student’s life to write them a letter about what they see and admire in them. Students had no idea the letters were coming. As they read, there were a lot of tears (the good kind), plenty of sniffling, and more than a few hugs. One letter highlighted a student's commitment to their family, “I admire the way you care for your family. You have been a huge help to your mom and a great big brother to your sisters.” Another included, "You are a unique, authentic sweet person, with a simple and humble heart, and a good daughter."
By the time everyone was packing up to head home, rain and all, many of the students seemed different than when they arrived just a couple of nights before. They left with a clearer sense of who they are, and with letters reminding them who believes in them.
For Israel, that’s the heart of mentoring. “There are just so many things that we don’t really hear from the people that matter the most to us. And sometimes it’s ’cause we’re not listening and sometimes it’s because we’re not making time to say them. But I really wanted these students to understand who they have in their corner and how much love and encouragement there is behind them.”
